Welcome to my World

Welcome to the domain different--to paraphrase from New Mexico's capital city of Santa Fe which bills itself "The City Different." Perhaps this space is not completely unique but my world shapes what I write as well as many other facets of my life. The four Ds figure prominently but there are many other things as well. Here you will learn what makes me tick, what thrills and inspires me, experiences that impact my life and many other antidotes, vignettes and journal notes that set the paradigm for Dierdre O'Dare and her alter ego Gwynn Morgan and the fiction and poetry they write. I sell nothing here--just share with friends and others who may wander in. There will be pictures, poems, observations, rants on occasion and sometimes even jokes. Welcome to our world!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Samhain, Dia de Los Muertos and Encounters of special kinds

I love this time of year and our special celebration is a big part of it. Even as a kid I loved Halloween although I was not allowed to go out much when I was small. Then as I grew up and drifted into a more pagan set of beliefs and discovered my ancient Celtic ancestors and their Samhain I felt I had hit a vein of pure gold. The idea of a key turning point in the year and a  place in time where the veil between our tangible world and that of the spirits and the realm of magic thins to allow passage through is just marvelous!

Growing up in the southwest US where the Latino or Hispanic culture is very influential, I learned about the same time of their custom of celebrating what northern Europeans call All Saints' Day. They call it Dia del Muertos or day of the dead and take that time to honor ancestors and departed family and friends. Although the decor of skulls and skeletons and such may seem spooky the mood of the day is much more festive and cheerful than that. They put out offerings or treats in cemeteries and other places and it becomes almost a fiesta. That is a neat concept too!

So the next forty eight hours or so will be spent in some special commemoration by me. Some of my Druid friends will be going thru a lovely ritual that one member has developed--me included--and I will wish some of my Pagan friends a happy new year since many say Samhain was also regarded as New Year's Day (or night since they tended to celebrate from sundown to sundown for the holy days as many Jewish Sabbaths and holidays are observed.) Being very sun-focused I tend to go with the midwinter solstice but hey, I am always up for a celebration!

Of course this time my most recent dear departed is little Belle. She has come by several times--just the faintest shadow out of the corner of my eye, a whisper of motion and stirring the air, a sigh, and I can almost but not quite feel her soft fur. Then she is gone again. I will put out a tiny dish of milk for her; that was a treat she liked and maybe another tidbit or two for her. And I will speak to all my departed friends and family in my version of our ritual.

Over this past weekend I drove over to Silver City near where I lived for a few months in 2008-09 and saw some friends. I spent several hours with one very dear friend who shares much of my beliefs and philosophy and was instrumental in my finding the modern Druids and seeking to walk that path. I had sent him a text message when I got home from the vet's after saying goodbye to Belle and asked that he call when he could. Within minutes he did and his first words were, "Are you okay?" The concern and care in a familiar voice was so precious and supportive. I decided to go over and spend a few hours together and that was even more healing and strengthening to me. We have a powerful bond that we are both sure goes back to shared prior lives. We are not a romantic couple in this one but a combination of spirit-siblings, friends and just very close so this visit meant a great deal to me. I also saw a girl friend who has just met a new man and I am praying it will be HEA for her! And I sold enough 'junk' at a flea market to pay my gas and a fast food lunch LOL. It was a good trip!

The second caller the day Belle left me was Sue Ellen Welfonder, a very dear friend and a huge dog lover as I am and we had a wonderful talk. I have followed her wonderful blog Tartan Ink for some time and that was what inspired me to do one of my own that in time became two. The other is www.deirdredares/blogspot/com and it is all about writing and my books--well Deirdre's and Gwynn's (smile). Tartan Ink is at http://tartaninkblog/wordpress.com



 And here are a few of photos from my trip.... Yes it is scenic and pretty and the sky was sooooo blue! I love the southwest so  much and know i have spent several lives here and it is one of my spirit's main homes.

Blessed Samhain to one and all and a happy Celtic New Year as well!
Go in peace, harmony and beauty all my friends!

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Too short the time

At 3:50 PM today Belle left to go wait at the Rainbow Bridge. It was a quiet, gentle passing and she knew she had my permission to go. I let her know her duties to me were done and it was now my time to do the best thing for her. I spent a quiet time before we left for the vet’s just holding her and she was pretty much asleep. When she didn’t try to get up for a late lunch that was the last sign I needed.

We had some quality time yesterday, a little bit of walking and her treats but she was very weak and confused today from early morning and I read in her little eyes that it was time. I would not make her struggle and suffer any longer, so it is done. Her memory will be precious to me forever and a part of her will be an unseen shadow at my side for the rest of my days. She left knowing she is loved and always will be and that is what matters. Do not weep for us; we are still together in many ways but her pain and difficulties are now over. Rojito is here to comfort me and in time a new Aussie girl—I am partial to girls—will come into our world. Go in peace, ma Belle, and may the Doggie Deity welcome you and hold you in loving arms for me.


I will remember her as in these pictures, the first and the last I have of her and with the little ID tag in the shape of a red heart that I got for her which I will now wear in her memory. She was a very special little fur girl and a dog of my heart.

It is rough yet but I did write a verse for her which I will share. Excuse the ragged rhythm and such; I will polish it later but the spirit is there.


Farewell to Belle

Too soon it ends, the time we share.
Yet I will know you still are there.
An unseen shadow at my side,
A nudge, a lick and you will ride
On many trips that I must make
And many walks that I will take
Even while you wait for me
To join you at The Bridge and be
Again a pair and partners true--
My heart will hold a place for you.

Burn’s "sauncy face" was truly yours
And loving memory ere endures.
The mismatched eyes and tender nose;
The piebald hues and twinkling toes.
Again you will be young and strong,
Agile, quick and nothing wrong
To slow your body and your mind—
That’s why you must leave me behind
But only for a little while—
We’ll share again in perfect style.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Walking in Beauty

In the spiritual path of the Navajo or Dine people, the phrase 'walk in beauty' appears often and is part of greeting a new day and some ceremonies. However they have a much broader and deeper meaning for the word than the shallow physical attractiveness we normally associate with it. The likes of Kim Kardashian and J-Lo are not truly beautiful from the inside out! Another translation is harmony but even that does not really cover the concept or do it justice.

Still, I have always been enchanted by this idea and try to fully  fathom it. I find it also fits in almost seamlessly with a good deal of the philosophy of the Druids. When you are living in harmony with the world around you you are also practicing the triple mysteries or principles of Truth, Art and Kinship. Those are the guiding lights of the branch of Druidry to which I currently belong and whose path I walk. It is a good feeling to 'fit' and feel you are a part of a much larger and finer entity, call it nature, the Universe or whatever you wish!

Today was one of those perfect fall days in the desert when you can just lose yourself in the good feelings. The sky was an almost unbelievable shade of blue--so deep and pure your eyes were dazzled. Then now and then a drift of the lightest clouds slipped across parts of it. Wind blown and frayed into feathery swirls and patterns like the wind-tossed mane of a wild horse, the pure white made the blue seem even more blue. To top it off the temperature was perfect--highs in the lower 80s and only a light breeze. Oh, it's allergy season and my nose and eyes are well aware of the fact but I can tolerate that! It was a kind of lazy day,not exactly fraught with ambition but that is okay too! Sometimes it is important just to sit, contemplate and absorb and simply be, not doing anything or solving any huge problems or  accomplishing great works! That was what I did.

Part of the time Belle was with me--yes, she is still here. For how long I have no idea for I trust she will tell me when she has had enough. I know she hurts a lot and is often confused and concerned. She will look at me with a question and worry in her dear little eyes. Mama, why don't I feel good? Why can't I do the things I used to? It breaks my heart and all I can do is stroke her tenderly and tell her she is still loved and when she gets to the Rainbow Bridge she will be like that again, forever. But I think she enjoyed the day too--we did our little 'yard walks' and she got her tidbits and treats and savors them. So even that was in harmony and beautiful--one more day we could peacefully spend together.

So I am thankful for a day in which I could walk in beauty and harmony and feel at ease and totally one with my world--and it was a lovely world today. I could ignore all the tragedy and wrong, pain and violence and bad things that were happening elsewhere just for this day. Tomorrow I may go back to tilting at my windmills but today was just for peace and serenity. And I thank the true Powers That Be for that! A day such as this is a blessing beyond compare.




Thursday, October 11, 2012

Just checking in

It has been hard to write lately as I do not like to sound gloomy or down and some days it is hard to find bright spots although I do stick by my philosophy that there always is one, at least some small blessing or gift that comes your way.

For now Belle is still with me although how much longer I cannot say. She gets four tramadols a day now to keep her calm and not hurting too much and that is the most the vet says she should have. When this stops controlling her distress, I will have to admit defeat but I have kept her with me for 90 days and some more than I thought I might in July. In between sleeping a great deal she still enjoys her treats and cadging bites when we have dinner--especially watermelon--all the dogs love watermelon!--and meat tidbits. We still go on at least a short and gentle walk most days and then 'yard walk' in the evening--which means Rojo and I get Belle to go with us around the fence on the half acre of our lot that is inside the chain link. Sometimes it is very slow but keeping her moving is important I think. I am sure she has some internal issues besides the arthritis--probably from the Prednisone and maybe the lupus affecting other organs etc. besides her long-term nose situation but I am not going to go into finding out what--she could not take surgery or much in the way of other treatments now and it would just prolong things for her which would be selfish of me. She will tell or show me when it is time. Meanwhile each day is a small gift but also sad.

I'm writing--turned in three stories during the past six weeks and working on some more to include a long-postponed Gwynn Morgan novel, the third of the Copper Stars Trilogy that fell to the back burner shortly after I lost Jim. He'd helped me with them and was an inspriation for them so it was hard to pick the threads up and continue but I want to do this now. I've withdrawn the other two from Mundania so I can reissue them with some minor revisions when the third one is done. Deirdre was born out of the writer's block that hit me after my Biggest fan and long term crit and brainstorming partner and tech advisor was gone. She's done well and I still enjoy that but want to get Gwynn's worok going again too. It has been long enough!

Fall is here--still mild but no longer blazing hot. Many beautiful sunsets and sunrises. I am up well before the sun most days and get to enjoy that lovely time of the day. The hummers seem to be gone; only bees on the feeders now. I have taken one down and will get the other soon, clean and pack them away until next season. But my roses are blooming very well--for only about 6 months they are doing fabulous! I did take pictures and will try to share them soon.

For now, hasta luego and bright blessings to one and all!

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Adopt a Dog Month--Part III


And the rest of the pix and quotes












Adopt a Dog Month, Part II


Dog quotes and pictures--first set



 













National Adopt a Dog month!

I just learned the other day that October is "National Adopt a Dog Month" and some places they add 'shelter' before dog. I support that idea heartily! In fact I have never bought a dog in my life and other than a few that were a gift, most were some kind of rescue, either formal or most informal. And I have been blessed with some truly amazing and wonderful dogs over the years, too.

Soem of you may have seen an email going around--I cannot find a link but will try to paste into a separate message. There were some really moving pictures and captions about dogs that a friend sent me recently. I cannot pick a favorite but I will warn you that some will make you misty-eyed! Dogs are just such incredible animals, they really, really are! I've seen quite a few homeless people with a dog and I can hardly imagine what a comfort it would be to have a true and totally loving and nonjudgmental friend when you had fallen on hard times. Two of the pix depict this and the love and bond comes through clearly.

I guess many would say it is foolish or selfish to keep a dog when you can barely keep yourself alive but I find it awfully heaertless to deprive a person with so little the precious bond with a pet. I have told my Belle that I'd live in my pickup with her before I would give her up. It is paid for so even if I had little else, we would have that much of a home! I don't expect to fall into such dire straits but these days none of us really know what can happen. Life and all we know seems to be on shaky ground these days.

To shift gears, I was shocked a few days back to learn of the death in a vehicle accident of Larry Dever, who had been the sheriff of Cochise County in Arizona for many years and was running for a fifth term. He was not on law enforcement business but heading off for a hunting trip wtih one of his sons when the accident happened. Not having been there or talked to the investigators I have no real idea of how it happened but it is tragic anyway. He was a good man and principled, something that is pretty rare these days. He was also my son's top boss since David works in the correctional side of the Cochise County Sheriff's Department. Mr Dever was his boss for much of his career there. My late husband and I also knew and respected him. Since Jim had been in law enforcement he was critical of those who he felt did not do a good, whole-hearted, and integrity based job. That was not a problem with Mr. Dever. All I can say is RIP to a person I regarded as a friend, if not a close one, and that I admired very much. It is a real loss to the county, the state and the nation for his was a sane, calm voice in the border issue disputes. I found this obit on line with a poem by the renowned cowboy poet Badger Clark. It seemed very fitting.


Larry Dever

1952-2012

There is some that like the city -
Grass that's curried smooth and green,
Theaytres and stranglin' collars,
Wagons run by gasoline -
But for me it's hawse and saddle
Every day without a change,
And a desert sun a-blazin'
On a hundred miles of range.
Just a-ridin', a-ridin' -
Desert Ripplin' in the sun,
Mountains blue along the skyline -
I don't envy anyone
When I'm ridin'.
When my feet is in the stirrups
And my hawse is on the bust,
With his hoofs a-flashin' lightnin'
From a cloud of golden dust,
And the bawlin' of the cattle
Is a-comin' down the wind
Then a finer life than ridin'
Would be mighty hard to find.
Just a-ridin', a-ridin'
Splittin' long cracks through the air,
Stirrin' up a baby cyclone,
Rippin' up the prickly pear
As I'm ridin'.
I don't need no art exhibits
When the sunset does her best,
Paintin' everlastin' glory
On the mountains to the west
And your opery looks foolist
When the night-bird starts his tune
And the desert's silver mounted
By the touches of the moon.
Just a-ridin', a-ridin',
Who kin envy kings and czars
When the coyotes down the valley
Are a-singin' to the stars,
If he's ridin'?
When my earthly trail is ended
And my final bacon curled
And the last great roundup's finished
At the Home Ranch of the world
I don't want no harps nor haloes,
Robes nor other dressed up things -
Let me ride the starry ranges
On a pinto hawse with wings!
Just a-ridin', a-ridin'-
Nothin' I'd like half so well
As a-rounin' up the sinners
That have wandered out of Hell,
And a-ridin'.
Ridin' - Badger Clark