The last post for 1964, the day after Christmas.It was not a Monday that year but a Saturday. My recollection of the actual Christmas is not too clear. Apparently it was not a bad day. I was thrilled to hear I was going to get a phonograph; it had been ordered but not arrived yet. This was another of Mom's special trading stamp surprises. Things deteriorated a bit the next day, it seems, after no major kerfuffles on the holiday. Peace was too good to be true for very long.
Dec 26, 1964
I got up fairly early, fed, ate and saddled to ride. All was ok. I made a system of leaving the mares in the upper pen and riding out later to turn them out. Came home and got the mail. I got a beautiful Christmas card and a little Indian necklace from Dusty. I guess that is his reply. It won me. Heard from Judy too. Rode out leading Buzz to turn the mares out. I got Chief and Leo led too. The folks had another full scale go-around today. God, they are driving me stark staring. I really feel like taking off just to escape that. I guess I could get a job somewhere. Dusty would try to help me. Or I could go and work for Cim in Missouri! Mom and I drove out this evening. Charlie Mike stayed to do the home chores. I wrestled Powwow around awhile. Eve’s curse hit me this evening and I really feel awful. The worry and strain is making me worse, no doubt. I guess I’ll go to bed. I tried to write letters this evening but didn’t get too far with them. I can dream about Dusty tonight and his card: “To you, Sweetheart. Merry Christmas” it said, I can’t really believe that a guy like him could really love me but I have proof in my hand. “My baby’s got me locked up in chains,” What a fine frail chain, but strong enough to hold my heart. The most perfect gift and just right that I have ever been given. A couple of *very* special letters and now this--do I have any room for doubt anymore? (2nd para?) The pen pals did not really know me, have not seen me at my normal unlovely self in my squalid setting, and thus were ’in love’ with an imagined vision as I had been with Jose Cazador. Somehow, Dusty looked past the squalor, the rags and tatters,the scars and strangeness and still says he sees not a muleskinner but an Angel! That truly seems incredible.
I had begun a plan that required three trips to the pasture but mostly worked out well. In the morning, we fed the pregnant mares and the Quarter Horses that were out there in the upper pen at the corrals. Then at midday I let them out or put them in the lower pen where the ditch ran through and opened the outer gate to let the rest of the herd in to clean up any feed left. That was reversed in the evening, often leaving the gate between open the two pens.
Of course the surprise card and gift from Dusty made my day. The card in itself was special but the gift even more. It was a tiny sun-face pendant on a very fine silver chain taped inside the card. It was so pretty. I wore it constantly for quite awhile, Eventualy the chain or its clasp broke but I did not lose the pendant and have it to this day. I dimly recall I woke one day and it had separated but I found it all. The pendant is now normally on a much larger chain along with a crystal from a mine up on the Huachucas (below which I broke my ankle in April 1999!) and a tiny Apache tear. I detached it to get a picture.
I have no idea what the parents were fussing about --the usual bullcrap that I ignored probably--but that had become such a common thing. It was not long before I was the receiver of many--more than previouly--nasty lectures and harrangues as well. The next two years were brutal for that.
For several years I had been suffering from severe monthly cramps. Later I learned that was mostly from endometriosis but then I had no idea, only knew I was torn by some vicious pains. A hot water bottle and many aspirins helped some, let me mostly be functional. I got little sympathy, though. Some from Mom at times but Dad basically accused me of whining and trying to get out of work. But other than a few abcessed teeth, those were the worst pain I ever suffered. My broken leg was truly not nearly as bad. And Powwow was the paint mare Susie's filly born that fall. She was rowdy!
Photos: The corrals from the bluff above. The lower pen is visible on the left side and the ditch below it. Next Tina, a month or two before her first colt, Bravo, was born. It looks like Bunny and Patsy--the two heads on the side.And then Patsy before she had Patrick, the same year (1964). I often fed grain in a feedbag to keep it from being wasted. I made them from empty feed sacks. No cost except my time to cut and stitch them by hand. Labor filled in a lot of expenses, one way or another. And last, the card and the little pendant. Yes, I have kept them all these years.
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