Although I share a home with my surviving brother, we go our own ways a lot and certainly give each other space. We are there if either of us needs anything but do not intrude too much on each others lives. The best of all possible worlds? Yes, to a large degree ,but at times I still miss being part of a couple. By the way, I am still not sure what that last line in poem one was about--my own voice? A ghost? I guess you can believe what you choose.The last is both somewhat satirical and yet also dead serious...
On Being By Myself
In deepening dusk I watch day die
And think back upon days gone by.
Remembering is bitter sweet;
Alone now,less than complete
After long years of being two—
My whole world centered around you.
I fill my days with busyness
But evening brings me some distress.
No one to talk to or to share
My thoughts, the day. No one is there.
For me life does go on, of course.
I shall survive and stay the course
But with the fall of night I miss
All I once had. Now loneliness
Lies over me as twilight falls.
In the dark, one small voice calls…
June 19, 2004
Blossoms of color burst into sight,
Brilliance and beauty filling the night.
Luminous patterns brighten the sky,
Blazing, then fading, still dazzle the eye.
Could I but keep one to draw out at will
When nights are too lonely, too stark, too still.
In mem’ry they linger, always and e’re,
In mind’s eye, in heart’s eye, to comfort me there.
undated, perhaps July 2004 or 2005
Out of the flame, I rose, I came.
Renewed, imbued, with attitude!
Purged of all shame, beyond all blame;
Distilled of dross, no less, no moss. (no mas?)
Just argent pure, e’re to endure.
Refined by fire, purged of desire,
A wish made real, flame doth anneal, and heal.