Memoir Monday, May 3, 1961

 

May 3, 1961 Wed

Just another school day. I woke up early and spent some time on my Chemistry. My new study hall was okay, a little more quiet and less crowded which is a help. We had a test in history and I only missed one. I read Green Mansions today. It was a very odd book, sort of haunting. I’ll bet the movie was good and Audrey Hepburn great as Rima. I’ll have to see it sometime. Not much else exceptional happened in the course of the school day. The folks had been to Prescott and since Ellsworth went to Yuma we have a new lawyer working on the latest lawsuit  deal. We have high hopes of things turning out good. I rode Chip. He was better, I think because of his one day lay off. The hay etc. really made my hay fever bad. I didn’t do much this evening, made a few paper dolls and cut out a shirt. I only got one letter today. I don’t think Hunter Joe is going to write again in spite of what he said. I mailed a letter to Shane today hoping to put him straight on everything. I hate to go to bed because of my hay fever but I guess I must. Oh, I have a sprained ankle, not bad but painful. The Sedona rodeo is this weekend. We may go. I guess I can hope anyway. It’s always fun. Maybe I’ll hear from somebody interesting tomorrow. I am getting discouraged. This penpal racket ain’t what it’s cracked up to be. Well gotta sack in for now so hasta luego.

My Junior HS year again.  After acting stupid the first semester, I was trying to settle down and do better. Chemistry was tough for me. The more mathematical parts were especially challenging. I never did really understand valence and some of that stuff. Poor Mr Clark was really a pretty good teacher and I respected and almost liked him but he taught hard subjects!! At least hard for me. English and History etc--the reading and writing focused subjects--were no great trouble and that was what gave me the grade average I ended up with; that and avoiding all the tuffies I could!! I still hate math and am not very scientific either although subjects like astronomy, geology and zooolgy do deeply interest me now--too late. 

My dad went overboard on lawsuit crap and it really got ugly after a time.  It infuriated me and I stayed out of it as much as I could. Unfortunately ours had become a very enmeshed family and with Dad large and in charge, it was his ideas, opinions and projects that the rest of us were totally engulfed by. It took me a long time to understand the whys and wherefores of much I went through from early teens until I finally 'escaped' and went off to college in September 1966.  

At times I do feel I was a real case study for all sorts of family dysfunctionality.  That's one reason for my memoir efforts since I now know many people had some traumatic and difficult times when young and often feel isolated and alone, even perhaps guilty about what they had no control over. I want to give them some hope and at least show they are not alone out there! You can slowly shed the poison of those toxic memories and experiences, It helps to focus on the good things, and there always were some no matter how bleak and rough it may have been.

I'd been doing pen pals for over a year and right at this point was somewhat disillusioned with it. Actually Hunter Joe (the name he used) who I later called Jose Cazador or just Jose stayed an active one for two more years. Shane was handicapped but had sent me several nice things which stirred up a bit of trouble at home when my father accused me of writing porn or something to lead the guys on!! I did nothing of the sort and hardly went beyond some **very  mild** flirting in my letters. Oh well! 

Chip or Chipper was one mule we kept a long time and that I liked. I rode him a lot. He was a very ordinary looking little mule, kind of a dark taupe or mousy gray-brown color with no markings. He was about 14 hands or 56 inches at the shoulder--just an easy-to-get-on size. He was also not lazy or stubborn, qualities I valued in my mounts.

Maybe I should explain the paper dolls. I enjoyed sewing and wanted at times to be a fashion designer. I took a kid's hobby started with a 'kewpie doll' looking doll a rare babysitter made me when I was five or six and eventually made some proportionate dolls, both gals and guys, and then tried out many designs, mostly the flashy western clothes of that era, on them. When I was moving a few years after my husband passed on, I sold the whole collection on eBay for an amuont that surprised me! The lady took some to a paper doll collectors' expo or convention in LA a few years back and won first place in the handmade category.  You just never know! 

Below are a few pictures of some of them. Feel free to laugh!! My slightly upgraded "kewpie doll" girls; some of my much later dolls; part of  the buyer's display; and the certificate they earned.