On this date in 1965 I just recalled it was the first anniversary of my initial real conversation with Dusty. Little did I know or even guess that the date would assume much greater significance some thirty six years later. Now the mundane setting forth of the day's events seems almost foolish when compared to the catastrophic shock of 9-11.
Sep 11, 1965, Sat
Got up at 6:30 and did my chores. Thought it would be a busy day and it was. There were some brief showers in the a.m. I rode Trix out about 8:00 to do the chores while the Boss went over to Jordan’s for hay. We finished our other chores and had lunch before getting ready to go to Prescott. We left about 1:00. Charlie Mike and I spent about an hour tramping around town. I got nail polish and remover, and a pattern for a men's size 15 western shirt. (For Bill Fisher --a pen pal’s fiance--and also Dusty.) Actually I lifted it but unintentionally. I guess I’ll order the material because nothing that I saw suited me. We got lots of groceries and came home rather late. The chores were a drag; we stumbled through them with headaches. The folks bought me some film. I really did a.o.k. today all considered. Dusty has been on my mind all day. It has been a year since I first fell under his spell. I surely never believed or guessed then how far it would go. My wildest dreams have come dangerously close to coming true in many ways. I keep asking myself if I’m really sure I want him because I think if I do, I can win. But I don’t want to be sorry later. If he gives up so much for me then I owe him my life and steadfast devotion. I guess the Boss will go to Franklin next week, Mon or Tues probably. Then we’ll have to check Stromberg’s Trout Creek place next. I’m really foolish but you know which way I lean. I hope Dusty doesn’t disappoint me again this week but Johnny is now back home. That will help.
Busy is relative, I guess. When small trips intervened, the normal chores were compressed into the available time and some were skipped or done in abbreviated fashion. For some reason, both Charlie Mike and I were tapped to go to Prescott with Dad that day. More often one or the other of us stayed home. While Dad took care of some kind of business, the two of us wandered around and I did a small bit of shopping. I must have had at least a dollar or two to spend even if things were very much cheaper then.
One of my pen pals was getting married, and knowing I was making shirts, she asked for a matched pair for herself and her husband-to-be as a wedding gift. I could use my own pattern for hers but needed a larger size for him. It turned out he and Dusty were similar in size so one would do for both. I'm not sure how I accidentally got out without paying for this one It was not intentional. Probably at J. C. Penney's and I did not find the kind of fabric I wanted, a colorful plaid, so just walked out maybe forgetting I had stuck the pattern in my purse as I was looking at the material. I was trying at that point to keep my nails pretty so needed some new polish and remover. Even the cowboy girl had a little bit of vanity though it was not super-practical.
Dusty had recently told me about the plan to get a legal separation which he hoped would work out, not being "a divorce" as such, to trigger his semi-ex taking off with Johnny. This was a rather new idea to me and had been to him when his lawyer friend suggested it, but we both hoped it would make our situation better. I had tried not to let my parents know he was around and I was seeing him for I knew how vicious they'd be about my "transgression" for which I'd be fiercely condemned. This might not make them approve but I would be less troubled.
The eternal "ranch hunt" still went on and Dad was into two new places that he portrayed as positive, exciting and well worth pursuing. I was now blase about these things and had ceased to take it seriously as a real possibility. Both places were on the far eastern edge of Arizona, which of course meant a long ways from Santa Fe track, almost bordering some Southern Pacific territory. And at this point with those conditions, I alone cared for the animals with Charlie Mike's help and "the Boss" was generally not paying close attention. That was a brief respite for me, but woe betide if some major issue arose and had to be brought to his attention!! The excrement would hit the oscillator for sure. "What did I do wrong this time?"
Pictures? It gets harder and harder to find any not previously shared! So here from the summers of 63-65 when a day or shorter trip was about to happen. Since we had two near-identical white Ford pickups during these years , I cannot date photos by the truck. Anyway, first me and Alex, then our parents and both boys and finally Charlie Mike alone. That was about the only time we got out of dirty ragged clothes that were regular work attire. I remember making my outfit. The skirt was purple and the blouse was pale lilac--favorite colors, then and still.
Another odd synchronicity: Sept 11, 1993 was the day Dusty was laid to rest in Mountain View Cemetery in Kingman. We had been apart a long time by then, no happy ending in this life for us due to much beyond our control or desire. I found the date some years later and in time visited his grave.
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